What do I really believe?

I have been quiet lately, I know. I may appear calm on the outside, but my soul is stirring underneath, like a barely controlled tempest. My mind is altered. My life is beginning to take a shape that I am unfamiliar with. In a previous post, I alluded to a change in perception that has been taking place for over a year now. Well, today I am ready to talk about it.

I have been hesitant to publicly address how I now believe. One reason being that I am constantly learning new things, and I know that in another year’s time, I will have morphed completely beyond where I am now, and I am loathe to make a fool of myself, speaking of things which I barely understand. I have only scratched the surface, I know. But I am yearning, starving for more, and every week I uncover something new that has been hiding in plain sight all my life: Principally, I have uncovered 2 things:

  1. the overwhelming, inexplicable foreshadowing of Jesus Christ throughout the Law and the Old Testament. Something like this cannot be forged. The conspiracy would have to span thousands of years, countless patient martyrs, and make sudden and complete perfect sense of the hidden mystery of God that was revealed in the birth, life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ our Messiah. The more you study, the more you will realize that the gospel message could not possibly have been contrived by men. I realize I’m a little late to the party on this one. Many of you have already discovered what has lately been filling me with amazement and unspeakable respect and awe in the face of our Creator and Redeemer. However, I want to lay these things out plainly for any other seeker that may be a bit behind, as I was (and am).
  2. the fact that the Law is every bit as relevant today as it ever has been. (This is the belief that I expect to be challenged for.) “The secret things belong unto the LORD our God: but those things which are revealed belong unto us and to our children for ever, that we may do all the words of this law.” Deuteronomy 29:29. “This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success.” Joshua 1:8. “Whosoever committeth sin transgresseth also the law: for sin is the transgression of the law.” I John 3:4. “Who now rejoice in my sufferings for you, and fill up that which is behind of the afflictions of Christ in my flesh for his body’s sake, which is the church: Whereof I am made a minister, according to the dispensation of God which is given to me for you, to fulfil the word of God; Even the mystery which hath been hid from ages and from generations, but now is made manifest to his saints: To whom God would make known what is the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles; which is Christ in you, the hope of glory: Whom we preach, warning every man, and teaching every man in all wisdom; that we may present every man perfect in Christ Jesus: Whereunto I also labour, striving according to his working, which worketh in me mightily.” Colossians 1:24-29

The second reason is difficult for me to admit. I am afraid. Afraid that my dearest friends and family members will misunderstand what I have to say. Afraid that they will think that I am not “looking unto Jesus as the author and finisher of our faith.” That’s why I intend to be very careful about how I word things. I will attempt to say exactly what I mean. I do not fear questions and challenges, so ask away. To quote a good friend of mine: “I am not afraid to discover the truth, whatever it may be” – which is what led me to this place to begin with.

Here is what has changed my life: deep inspection of the Law of God, the Torah. I have only just learned this term, its meaning, and the importance and impact of these books (Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy). I am not saying they are the most important books of the Bible, merely that we have neglected them for centuries, and that it’s high time they reclaim their proper place in the hearts and lives of mankind.

Now I have long since wondered about Christianity and its neglect of just one of the Ten Commandments. Why neglect one? This has been an ongoing, nagging question in my heart since childhood. There have even been phases in my life where I have attempted to keep the Sabbath, but they were always short-lived. I lacked the urgency needed to follow God’s rules (due to being steeped in modern-day, “fluffy” Christianity).

However, my journey began in earnest after learning that I am BRCA positive. I started to wonder if my genes harbored some trace of a Jewish heritage. Having always believed that the Law was given to God’s chosen people, this wonderment changed something in me. Was the Law intended for me? However, I was only in a phase of curiosity. I had not yet reached the intense desire to find out everything that it’s possible for a person to know about God and His Law (which are insights into His personality and righteousness).

While I was mostly ignoring the occasional blips on my spiritual radar, I went on with my life as normal. On the other hand, my dad started to dig and began sharing things with me. His conversation and lifestyle sparked in me a compulsion to prove him wrong. I was afraid that he was placing his salvation in his own hands, not in the pierced hands of Jesus Christ alone. I feared he was on the verge of practicing gnosticism, wondering if he believed he knew things that were only revealed to a chosen few. I would come home from visits at my parents’ home and search and comb the scriptures, comparing the old (testament) with the new, and the new with the old, trying all the while to read them with naked eyes. Does that make sense? Eyes that were not looking through filtered lenses of world-view, doctrine, or any other type, striving to merely see what God is saying about His Covenant and everything else. Deeper and deeper, revelation after revelation, the Scriptures slowly began to change my mind, and only God knows how deep the rabbit hole goes. I am beginning to suspect it is infinite.

Here is the third reason that I have been hesitant to share, and it is the biggest. I have this fear that perhaps I am wrong. Maybe it’s the urging of the Holy Spirit asking me not to get into things over my head. Most likely it’s Satan, trying to prevent me from discovering the fullness of God’s majesty and plan of redemption. I would like to think that I know the difference between the voice of God and that of His adversary, and I believe that I do. However, for your sakes, please do not take anything I have to say at face value, and do your own digging. Please. If there is anything you take away from all of my rambling, be it this admonition: Find out for yourself; it is your responsibility. This is not, however, a disclaimer. I am not attempting to wash my hands of my part in this movement. I am not pretending that I won’t share the blame if I mislead anyone, and God knows that is the last thing I want to do, so I have waited this long to share the beliefs of which I am now fully convinced. I am just stating, that if you believe a lie without consulting the Scriptures, you will be equally responsible for your own misguidedness.

In my next few posts, I will be addressing a few of the things I have learned very recently, and I hope they spur you toward revival and a thirst for the Living Water and His righteousness. “Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.” Matthew 5:6.Christie Thomas Even if you disagree with everything I say here, I hope these words compel you to dig and find out whether I am right or wrong. I urge you to search the Scriptures for yourself, Old and New Testaments alike, and find out what God has to say to you.

It’s time to stop relying on conventions, traditions, and unsupported doctrines of men. Some doctrines are good; some are bad, but we have everything we need to allow us to discern the truth. We have no excuse to mindlessly accept what we’ve always been told. We have been given the Word and the Holy Spirit of God. It’s time to stop neglecting the Holy Scriptures – the one thing in this world that reveals the message of life freely to all who believe.


This is enough for one day. Aside from the scriptures provided here, I realize I have said next to nothing of substance in this post. However, I am afraid to write everything I am thinking at once. (I am afraid you will get bored and stop reading!) Next time, if God gives me grace to complete it, I will begin to tackle what I believe is the three-fold purpose of the Law:

  1. To reveal sin in our lives, thereby proving our need for a Savior.
  2. To act as an indisputable sign, pointing perfectly and completely at Jesus Christ as Messiah.
  3. To show us how to live an abundant life during our sojourn here on earth.


Later, I intend to cover some common objections.

I would also like to talk about the names of God and His Son, the feast days, worldliness in the church (including pagan practices), and the tricky way that Satan has convinced us (almost collectively) that sin is okay.

These are all from a layman’s viewpoint; I am seeking to educate myself but have no credentials of any kind. However, I am a perpetual student of Yahweh and His holiness. “Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” 2 Timothy 2:15


I John 4:1-5:

Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world.

Hereby know ye the Spirit of God: Every spirit that confesseth that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is of God:

And every spirit that confesseth not that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is not of God: and this is that spirit of antichrist, whereof ye have heard that it should come; and even now already is it in the world.

Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.

They are of the world: therefore speak they of the world, and the world heareth them.

6 responses to “What do I really believe?

  1. Pingback: The Heart of the Christmas Controversy | Full Circle Homeschooling

  2. Hello, Friend!
    I’m not grasping every word, up there, but I do grasp the struggle, as I went through a similar one, years ago. My husband made me put away all books but the Bible, which helped enormously.
    You are forging your faith. Don’t stop!
    As for the Sabbath, I believe two things:
    1. Keeping the Sabbath shows you believe the Creation account, as alluded to in Leviticus (I think?)
    2. Jesus ushered in this present age which is the Sabbath.
    We now rest from our own works and rely completely on His finished work, as mentioned in Hebrews.
    So, in a way, I try hard at least to appear to keep the Sabbath, for those who are watching and wonder about my Creation beliefs, and in a way, I do nothing at all about it, since He has declared the work “is finished”. Holler if you want to discuss it more. Not afraid of the truth, here, either.
    Finally, let me say the eyes of the Lord travel all over the earth looking for someone whose heart is turned toward Him, and I’m sure He has found a “someone” in you. ❤

  3. Good morning, Kathy!

    Sorry I wasn’t clear about everything. I’ve got some really big concepts that I’m trying to communicate in a nutshell, lol.

    As far as this present age being the sabbath, I’m not so sure. Do you have a reference so that I can test that doctrine? I agree with the sabbath being a reflection or a memorial of the creation week. However, I believe that the creation week represents the big picture. I believe that the world is in pain because of our departure from God’s ways. I tend to think that the sabbath rest foreshadows the Millennial Reign of Christ, which comes at the end of the week (era?) and not in the middle of it.

    Here are some scriptures that show why I believe the weekly sabbath is still relevant to us today, aside from the ones I usually mention concerning God’s Law, such as ALL scripture being profitable for doctrine (2 Timothy 3:16), and man living by EVERY word that proceeds from the mouth of God (Matthew 4:4) – in which instance, Jesus was quoting Deuteronomy because it is still relevant, and always will be. Jesus was also familiar with Deuteronomy 4:2 which instructs us not to add to or take away from the commandments [which specifically say to keep the 7th day sabbath (Exodus 20:8-11) not just some interpretation or representation of what that sabbath might signify].

    Colossians 2:16-17: Therefore let no one judge you by what you eat or drink, or with regard to a festival, a New Moon, or a Sabbath. These are a shadow of the things to come, but the body that casts it belongs to Christ.

    If you read all of Colossians, you will see that these Gentiles had been in the habit of will-worship and abnegation. Paul was here giving them permission to participate in God’s feasts, which are like big party days. The mainstream interpretation of this passage is based on the misunderstanding that God’s righteousness can somehow cease to be God’s righteousness. All of God’s commandments are righteousness: Psalm 119:172. His righteousness will last forever, and the Law is equated with the truth. Psalm 119:142. Do we believe in relative truth? Or is truth something that does not change with the tides?

    You can see from Colossians that the sabbaths and festivals ARE a shadow of things to come. They still are. We are still waiting on God tabernacling with man in the Millennium. We are still waiting on the trumpet blast. We are still waiting for true rest. The Law will remain relevant until heaven and earth pass away (God’s two witnesses to the ratification of the covenant – Deuteronomy 30:19) and until every single word is fulfilled (Matthew 5:17-19).

    At least twice in Hebrews, the Law is referred to as still being a shadow of things to come: Hebrews 8:5 and 10:1.

    If you read the passage in Hebrews 8, you will see that the Levites are still legitimately God’s ministers on the earth, which is why Christ could not be a high priest on the earth. There was already an earthly law established for that. Instead, the writer explains that the earthly ministry IS a shadow of Christ’s heavenly ministry. This whole passage is an apologetic that explains to the Hebrews how it is legal (according to God’s eternal Law) for Christ to be our high priest without having descended from Levi. The author doesn’t say, “well, now the Law is abolished, so Christ can be our high priest because the Levitical tribe doesn’t matter anymore.” Also, you will see in the last 10 chapters of Ezekiel that the Levitical ministry will be reestablished during the Millennial Reign of Christ.

    Also, the tribe of Judah has returned to the promised land, but the kingdom of Israel has not. This passage has not happened yet, but it will, when Israel turns back toward God’s ways:

    Isaiah 58:12-14
    Those from among you will rebuild the ancient ruins; You will raise up the age-old foundations; And you will be called the repairer of the breach, The restorer of the streets in which to dwell. “If because of the sabbath, you turn your foot From doing your own pleasure on My holy day, And call the sabbath a delight, the holy day of the LORD honorable, And honor it, desisting from your own ways, From seeking your own pleasure And speaking your own word, Then you will take delight in the LORD, And I will make you ride on the heights of the earth; And I will feed you with the heritage of Jacob your father, For the mouth of the LORD has spoken.”

    Anyway, I know this does not represent mainstream Christianity, but you are an independent thinker, so here are a few things for you to consider. Please, please let me know if I am misinterpreting or grasping at straws. Or if I am not being logical in some way or another. I am still learning myself, and the best way that I learn is when other folks come along and poke holes in my theology, lol. Thanks for commenting, Kathy!! I hope we get to continue this discussion!

  4. Pingback: It’s That Time of Year Again… | Full Circle Homeschooling

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